well, I used to be delusional and living a plastic lie. Like, I would do anything to prove that I was stupid in an insecure way because that was my role in reality. I used to spell “okay” like “okie” and stuff. Most of my former blogs have been deleted. I don’t think I’ve changed at all. I’ve become more free in myself, and look how they all try to enslave me in some cliche again. My favorite “change” person was the one who called me a liar. I’m not valued in my reality so everything I say is a lie no matter, and I can’t defend myself, loser, right? Telling hte truth causes massive schisms in my reality because i’m almost always innocent. Look how she freaked out when i said a truth. Surprise, I’m hiding, bitch. I was so pissed off because she knew I was abused. She was one of those people. Manipulative due to inability or past failings — they fling themselves at me. That’s why I check them out. It’s like, you made a lower score on your SAT and told me it was because you were hungry; you have lower line scores; you have no friends; you never played sports (that’s a big one for me); you never had a job. I was hungry, freezing and working multiple jobs. My brain is shitty anyway and it functions the same no matter the conditions.